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Fun House

February 23rd, 2012

No one ever wants to admit they’ve become boring. We live in our own heads, walking around thinking we are the most exciting people on earth, when in reality, we’ve just fallen victim to mundane routines. The only time we ever come to grips with reality is when someone we care about tells us just how boring we actually are, and even then it’s hard for us to believe. “Me? Boring?” We ask. “How can that be? I’m one of the most exciting and spontaneous persons that ever lived!” we say. Then it hits us. “Maybe I have become a little boring…” And when this moment of clarity finally does hit us, it’s then that we want to change and prove to everyone that they’re in fact, totally wrong.

Some of us go to extremes to prove how exciting we can be. Some of us jump out of planes, others choose from a wide variety of death defying stunts to prove to themselves that they have not, in fact, become boring. But ultimately, some of us just can’t decide what to do to be more fun. Some of us just sit around and wait for that one exciting person to come along. The one that will show us exactly what we’ve been missing out on this whole time, denying the inevitable truth that they have become quite lame. They just coast through life with the same job they despise, trapped in the same passionless relationship they always complain about, but just can’t seem to leave.

With that said, there are two types of people in this world, the bored, and the truly boring. The bored get out and find fun, the truly boring just wait around and complain that there’s never anything fun to do. I used to say “only the boring are bored”, but that in fact isn’t true. Only the boring STAY bored. We’ve all been bored once or twice in our lives, and believe it or not, that’s when we’ve had some of our most creative and exciting ideas. On the other hand, we’ve all been truly boring once or twice in our lives as well. It’s up to us to look at ourselves in the mirror once in a while and ask ourselves, “Am I actually having fun?” and if we aren’t, do something about it!

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Text Games.

September 18th, 2011

When a girls bored she’ll text. Girls can text 3x’s faster and 5x’s more people than any man can ever hope to. It’s part of evolution. Beepers slowly turned into two-way pagers, and then beeper codes were slowly transformed into text messages, then finally cell phones where able to send texts, and here we are today. But if your with a girl and she’s texting, evolution cannot change the fact that she’s straight up bored. You’ll see pretty girls everywhere texting so as to avoid the everyday human interaction, and the chance that they might get hit on.

You’ll even see girls texting in packs, for example, you’ll probably see a group of 4 teenage girls walking through the mall, each texting someone and not even talking to one another. Or you’ll see a group of coworkers on a train, all texting away because they can’t stand another conversation with the same people they see in the office day in and day out. Now with smartphones, texting has turned into social networking, emailing and even twittering, which makes it %100 more likely that you’ll see people out in public with their face buried in their phones.

Still, with all this technological advancement, it still doesn’t change the fact that if a girl is on her phone, she’s probably bored with whatever is going on around her. As guy’s, that’s where we come in. If you can somehow manage to be more entertaining than whatever or whoever is distracting her on the phone, then she’s all yours! I mean, girls just wanna have fun, so all we really have to do is be more fun than whatever is going on in her phone. But then, when your not around, you have to make sure your texts are more entertaining than her everyday life! It’s a constant back and forth.

Fuck, Can’t we just call each other anymore?!

Picture by Lex of 8mts.com

Posted in Nightlife, Short Stories, Style | 1 Comment »

The Creep

May 31st, 2011

Pretty girls have 3 main categories in which they use to classify the guy’s they meet on a day to day basis. These three categories are, “The Hot Guy”, “The Nice Guy”, & “The Creepy Guy”. The hot guy may not necessarily be the best looking of all guys, but he holds enough charisma, social value, money and/or career status that triggers her attraction switch. The nice guy’s are the guy’s they meet everyday whom they are not attracted to at all. They’re the guys who go out of their way to do and say sweet things, hold open doors as they walk passed, and offer to buy them drinks at bars, all in their mind as an attempt to sleep with them. Nice guy’s usually have about a %25 chance of ever making a pretty girl attracted to them, if that. Creepy guy’s however, have absolutely NO chance.

From my observation, there are two kinds of creepy guys. “Actual” creepy guys & “Perceivably ” creepy guys. Actual creepy guys are well, actually creepy. You know, the murderers, rapists, stalkers, ect. that we hear about everyday on the news. Actual creepy guys are almost impossible to spot however, because they appear to the world as everyday “Nice Guy’s” or “Hot Guys” so to hide the world from their innate creepiness. Perceivably creepy guys are just that, perceived by women to be creepier than they actually are. For instance, that creepy guy at the bar who stared at them all night was more than likely trying to muster up the courage to talk to them, but failed due to the circumstances. To a pretty girl, the more socially awkward a guy is, the more “creepy” he is.

While social awkwardness is the main factor that separates “hot guys” from “creepy guys”, a guys ability to adjust to different social environments help determine just how “hot” or just how “creepy” he may be perceived. Clothing style plays a huge part in this phenomenon. Take a big city hipster for example and stick him in a room with a rich preppy crowd where he knows absolutely no one. He could either embrace his eccentricity, be the life of the party and be the “Hot” guy, or he could feel intimidated, shy, and be that “creepy” guy standing in the corner wearing all the leather. To sum it up, if a pretty girl doesn’t think your “hot” or “nice”, to her your just “Perceivably ” creepy. All the while she’s probably dating the “Hot” guy who’s “Actually” creepy, so don’t fret.

- Fin

Click here to watch “The Creep” by The Lonely Island & Nikki Minaj

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